new crush and maybe a poem or song

Yes. I have a new crush.

It may be creepy...to him. But he's famous. So he's used to these things.

No, he doesn't know I exist. But he inspires me.

It's Jamie Campbell Bower, and he plays Jace in City of Bones, which is the movie that was made out of my faaavvvorrrite book series. And he sings. And has a British accent, but not when he sings.

He has the most amazing voice ever, is six feet tall, has blonde hair and blue eyes and just the most hilarious and amazing personality...and I'm gushing.

But that's okay, because I miss gushing (over someone I can't possibly have).

There's something safe about that.

I've needed an escape. Something to fangirl over. And I have it now.

I love his music. I'm listening to one of his song's now: Waiting. I loooove it.

It's such a happy song, while being longing at the same time. But it's a summer song, reminds me a little bit of Summer Shudder by AFI if it were acoustic. Perfect for playing around a bonfire on a beach at night, with sparklers and hot dogs and maybe some bottles of beer.

Perfect night.

I've learned to crochet in the past few days (week or so). It's incredibly...cathartic. Relaxing. Fun.

I've launched an online store to sell knitted/crocheted headbands and other accessories. Hopefully it does well.

I've also started drawing again, and (as usually tends to happen) I'm like ten times better than I was before. I don't know how that happens. Maybe because I go on a long hiatus I come back with more patience? Determination? I don't know, honestly. But now I'm REALLY good, if I may say so myself.

This song is so inspiring. It makes me happy. It makes me want to write.

V.1
Blue bottles lined on a shelf
sunlight streaming in on the dusty windowsill
as I sit here with my strings and my song

White lace on the bed
rose petals falling from the dresser
onto my lap... they kiss my lips and whisper so long

Chorus.
There's ink in my wrists and fingertips
Cut me open and watch it flow
like a river, like a stream
it's gonna flow strong and slow

Make me happy or make me sad
that's what you can always do
Even if I tried I couldn't control you
You flow in me
So strong and slow and glad

V.2
Jars filled with hairpins and fireflies
a cracked countertop and a collection
of rocks

bits of paper and ice my castle will rise
but my castle is full of ghosts and cinderblocks
So I run there to escape from the world

Chorus. (2x)
There's ink in my wrists and fingertips
Cut me open and watch it flow
like a river, like a stream
It's gonna flow strong and slow

Make me happy or make me sad
that's what you can always do
Even if I tried I couldn't control you
You flow in me
so strong and slow and glad

So strong and slow...and glad