popup concerts and perfection

So I just finished watching a bunch of videos of Jamie's popup shows on youtube, and I'm in SUCH a good mood.
I didn't realize he was such a great person! I mean, I knew he was cool, and funny, and down-to-earth, and that he can sing, amazingly, and play the guitar...

But he's AMAZING. He just has such a great personality. I hope, for his sake and ours (his fans) that he never gets TOOOOO famous. Because that way he can keep doing popup concerts and being down-to-earth and funny and actually keep having conversations in the middle of his concerts and doing random great things.

Ah. Jamie makes me happy.

Did I mention I MET HIM?

He had a popup concert here in NY, in Union Square, on May 3rd. And I met him. And he signed my book. My copy of City of Bones. Like, he knows I exist. And he spoke to me. After he had driven off in the car and I went and knocked on the window. He rolled down the window for me. And spoke to me. And signed my book.

*fangirling much?*

I still have the pen he wrote with.

*yeah*

Now, after watching the videos of the concerts, I see that that's the type of person he is. He wouldn't NOT have rolled down the window. He's just that nice of a person. And that humble.

It's still awesome.

I'm just always inspired by him. Because he's so creative, and such a nice person besides.

I want to be like that one day. To be well known enough that people enjoy my work, but not toooooo well known so that I can't walk down a street anonymously. Not for the sake of me being famous, so much as to know that people have fallen in love with the characters I've created. That's what I want. To create an alternate world for people to live in and love in and never want to leave.

My role models are Cassandra Clare, Oscar Wilde and Suzanne Collins. If I could combine all three of them and then add a dash of myself...

Perfection.

I like having an online diary.

There's something comforting about it. It's like, you can be as anonymous as you want, but there is still the chance that someone can see what you're going through and either rejoice with you or relate to your struggles.

Why do I seem to be the girl that everybody wants/ nobody wants at the same time? And yet, the one that nobody gets because she won't open up to anyone?

Sometimes I think to myself that it would be good to be single my whole entire life. That a relationship is not worth the stress and the pressure and the disagreements.

But I do want children. And I don't think I want to adopt and be a single mom, although that thought has crossed my mind more than once. But what's brought this on is that at my job, there is a guy, Carl, who is beyond aggravating.

Why is he beyond aggravating, you might ask.

Well.

I'll tell you.

The man doesn't know how to take "no, thank you," for an answer. There's a difference between being persistent and harassing someone. He's borderline harassing.

I'm not a naturally rude person. I try to be polite. But now I understand why people say that others often mistake their kindness for weakness...gosh.

He offered to drive me home yesterday. I said "no, thank you." Multiple times. When I was leaving work, he pulled up in his car and blocked my path and insisted to drive me home. I said NO, THANK YOU, have a good evening.

He decided to park his car and WALK me home.

Now I will admit, I could have stopped about a block away from home and tried to dismiss him, but that thought didn't cross my mind at that moment. So now he knows where I live. And that's scary.

Especially because he said that he wants to get to know me so he can know "how to break me down" (the freak does he mean by that? He can go screw himself, honestly) and he also asked for my number, and when I didn't give it to him, he said "I can get it, you know, but I'd prefer if you gave it to me."

I told my mom and my dad, and my dad wants me to bring him his number so he can call him and tell him to back off. I'm also going to tell both my bosses. Because it's not cool.

It makes me uncomfortable. And if it makes me uncomfortable, then it's workplace harassment.

He's been bugging me for two days straight. Like, can't you take a hint? No, I don't want you to buy me lunch. No, I don't want you to cook me dinner. No, I don't want to call or text you. No, I don't want to give you my number. No, I don't want you to be my friend.

He says that he wants to decide whether I'm the type of person he wants as a friend, or the type of person he wants to tell stories to his kids about how we met.

DON'T I GET A SAY IN WHETHER I WANT TO BE FRIENDS OR NOT?

He's seriously pissing me off. And I know I don't show it, because I'm polite, but goodness. There's a song playing on Pandora right now...the lyrics are "and the cracks begin to show."

That's how I feel right about now.

Completely just...ugh. I haven't disliked someone so much in quite some time. Yeesh. I just had to vent about this. And get it on record, because he's freaking me out.

Okay. Later.
Good night.