I want to go home.

Home to my daddy, with my cats, and just have everything be okay.

This is not home. This will never be home.

Right now, the wind is whipping outside, howling and throwing the branches of the trees against the side of the house and sounding for all the world like it's a deep blizzard out there. It's not. It snowed earlier but now there's a polar blast or something coming in.

This part of my life is hard again. It had gotten better, I'd gotten into a routine and I knew what was what even though I struggled, but now there's another page being turned, and it's hard. Well, challenging.

When I write about it I'm not as depressed or stressed as I am when I just think about it in my head.

Thought I should mention that things are going really well with Cal and me...excellently, in fact. Figure I ought to record that for posterity's sake.

My friend Nia is finally happy in a relationship...and I'm SO happy for her. Like really. Seriously. She deserves it. I hope they make it work.

I want my room. My bed. I want to go home. But my cats are here, and I said I would stay the night because last night they escaped the room and there was chaos with the other cats...

I need a full-time job that pays me $30k a year. Preferably $36k. Or at the very least, $30k because then I can do tutoring and make up the rest. And I need it in less than a month's time. And then I need a studio apartment.

There will come a point in my life when this part is past; when it's sorted out and it's over and it's easier. Oh yeah, it'll be hard in its own way, but this too shall pass.

See ya.