It's okay. You've never really gone through this before. You haven't actually been in a long term relationship, and certainly not with someone who is actually honest about their feelings and doesn't judge you for yours.
Basically, every step you take from here on out is going to be new to you, and so it's going to be scary. But just because it's scary doesn't mean it's dangerous. And it doesn't necessarily mean you're going to fall and get hurt.
Climbing a mountain is scary. Those people are thousands and thousands of feet above sea level, hanging from a precipice. But look how many of those people successfully climb the mountain. Yeah, they probably bruised their fingers and scraped their knees along the way, and they probably had a few moments where they felt like they were about to lose their foothold or like they were short of breath from the altitude or like they didn't have the energy to go on. They probably also questioned if it was a good idea for them to be climbing the mountain in the first place.
But if them and their climbing partner both agree that they want to keep climbing, even if it's hard and windy and snowy and the visibility is low and sometimes it's cold and there have been sunnier days when they weren't climbing the mountain, wouldn't you say that's a good thing? And that it's worth it for both partners to continue climbing the mountain to get a little farther along?
Especially if one partner says they're serious about the climb, not just scrambling up to see where they can reach. And that they've taken the climb seriously for a long time now. The partner who was worried that they were just dragging that other partner along for the climb...I would say that that partner can relax now.
You guys both want to continue climbing. And really, I know you're scared and worried that a big gust of wind might come along or that a mountain goat will knock one of you off, but if you stay in one spot, that's not going to do any good. You've got to keep moving.
Neither one of you knows what the top of the mountain looks like. Neither one of you knows how long it will take to get there. You can't base it on how long it took other people to climb the mountain, because those people had different strengths and weaknesses, and the weather conditions were different for them as well.
What matters, in the end, is that as long as your partner is not sabotaging you and trying to knock you off, that you continue to climb.
Because that in itself is an experience. That is life.
And you are living.
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